LAZY OR BORED?
No doubt there are things you are hopeless at doing. Maybe you can write like a professional or breeze through the Times’ crossword quicker than the 6:20 express train passing a station. But when it comes to anything close to playing a musical instrument, it seems you have ten left feet on your hands.
We simply accept this. No doubt if we applied ourselves we would be better at knocking out a tune but we wouldn’t be playing Tchaikovsky’s 1st Piano Concerto after hearing it the first time.
Leslie Lemke did. He was 14 years old. The movie “The Music Lovers“, about Tchaikovsky was on TV. He listened to the concerto. He played it. Simple. He’d never had music lessons but he did have cerebral palsy and blindness.
I like Tchaikovsky but have trouble playing the Beatles. OK, I accept it.
Honestly some people couldn’t find their way home if they were outside their front gate, but then they may have note pads with the explanation to Quantum theory’s biggest hurdle. They might think it amusing that no one else has thought of it.
What has this got to do with children? What has it got to do with us, as adults? Plenty; we both (children and adults) have to realize when a child has above average intelligence, then nurture it. It seems ironic, but the brighter a child is, the more vulnerable it is.
I’m not going to talk about savants like Dustin Hoffman portrayed in “Rain Man” because they are rarer than prodigies and ‘gifted children’ who populate about ten percent of the intelligence scale.
The ‘gifted’ or ‘damn smart’ kids are the ones who don’t have the apparent disabilities of the savant. Yet these kids often suffer from a range of social and personality problems. Lots of this is cleverly hidden behind a mask of moodiness or silence because it’s accepted as pensive mood. Sometimes it’s hidden as anger or antisocial behavior.
The bright child who is bored in school maybe classed as lazy or dull, or if they cause disruption, labeled as trouble maker. But there’s more.
The child who’s talent is recognized often feels pressure to excel in all areas but can’t because their talent is uneven. They may excel at math but not language. They suffer feelings of inadequacy and can’t admit it. They may not be able to explain it, and that leads to frustration then alienation.
We need to gently coax these kids in social skills or their weak points to round out their success in life.
Tesla lost because he lacked the social skills and business savvy.
Children have access to so much information on the net. They can pursue any topic they might want to know about. It is important that they have a love of learning but please steer them into social physical events as well.
Physical exercise is as important to mental development as academic studies. It stimulates the blood and fires up the nervous system. Playing a sport may not seem attractive to an intellectual child but in that case it’s easy to get them to help in other physical areas like digging a vegetable garden or building a dog house; anything that stimulates cooperation and use of muscles.
When picking a sport, pick one that teaches team work as well as competitiveness. Both aspects are necessary. It’s wrong to teach the child to win at all costs. When aggression takes over they’ve lost the plot. We achieve far more in union with others than we can alone. Getting along with people is essential for a happy life.
Social events like parties, visiting friends or sleep-overs at a friends’ house teach children about sharing and gets them aware of other ways of life.
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YOGA FOR KIDS?
Children will like yoga and their bodies are supple enough to get into the sometimes uneasy postures that we adults don’t like. The postures are not essential (you can vary them) but they help with proper breathing and function of the body. Good posture is very important to your well being so teach children before they develop bad habits like slouching.
The benefits of this oldest form of exercise still practiced make it well worth your while. It’s relaxing and has a calming effect to call upon in times of stress. It benefits the bones, muscles and all the organs and balances the body’s energies. Childhood complaints such as asthma, bed wetting, stomach problems, and constipation are only a few areas where improvement happens.
The main area is the breathing and direction of energy (called Prana) to strengthen selected areas.
Proper breath control is essential for mental and physical performance. It is obviously an important aspect of all forms of sport, playing any wind instrument or singing. It aids concentration and therefore learning so get them into a yoga class early when they can enjoy the experience as part of a daily routine to help them through life.
Your own life will benefit from learning Yoga techniques. Plenty of books are available or you only need to type the word into Google for a fund of information.
There are so many branches of Yoga. I’d suggest Hatha Yoga as a start because it deals with the physical body. If you feel so inclined, after a thorough training, move on to Raja Yoga to develop will-power and mental faculties.
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SWEARING.
What do you do when your child utters a swear word? It’s going to happen one day. We are not all saints when we hit our thumb or pick up something unexpectedly hot. They’ll hear TV or big brother or other kids and when that ‘word spurt’ begins they’ll use that word just like any other.
Kids experiment and if they find a forbidden word they’ll have fun repeating it to test reactions. The more you react to the word, the more they know they are on to something good, so they’ll use it again.
Lots of swear words enter the language because of so frequent use. Many are in the dictionary. They lose their power to shock. Remember Rhett Butler in ‘Gone With the Wind’? “I don’t give a damn.” isn’t shocking any more. A list of
When children let loose with swearing let them know those words are only appropriate in the right place, very wrong in front of other people like granny or strangers. Tell them they shouldn’t use them indiscriminately. It’s best not to use them at all unless they’re absolutely sure.
You could suggest they say poo or pee etc rather than the alternatives.
You set the example, so be like you want your child to be.
Jay Ross
